Is There Room at the Table?

(week 3)

Remember how tense it was finding a table to sit at during lunch in Middle School? Maybe it was just me. But I always found myself wanting to sit with a certain group, probably because they looked exciting to me, and finding that I didn't quite fit in. Well, that middle school lunch experience has been the synopsis of my entire life. I've always struggled to find my place at the table.

As I've grown into myself, excepted my authentic self I have become comfortable with finding my own place. Sometimes it's at a full table. Sometimes it's alone. But I never give up looking for a spot.

When the U.S. Supreme Court ruling on Obergefell v. Hodges occurred in 2015, it left a lot of people wondering if there was room at the table for them. There were those who unabashedly celebrated, those who felt defeated, and those who (like me) were somewhere in the middle - wading through the complexity of the Court's decision.  You see, I have several people very dear to my heart that are in a same-sex relationship. I felt inner conflict between my support of traditional marriage and my desire for their happiness. In essence, I found myself reverting back to that unsure 13 year old, holding her lunch tray staring into the endless abyss of the cafeteria wondering which table to choose.

I feel like I've been standing, staring and wondering for a long time. I have zero qualms about my faith, I love my Church - and I love my LBGTQ+ friends. How does that all fit? And then, I remember I have the power of choice, and I have my voice.

There  is  room  at  my  table.

I can and will use my voice as Alexander Dushku suggested in his 2015 speech (link provided at end of post). If I want there to be room at the table for those who support traditional marriage, I need to use my voice to talk about my own experiences and beliefs. And I can do that while still making room for those who support same-sex marriage. Dushku discussed the way our country responded to Roe v. Wade in creating an environment where both pro-life and pro-choice individuals can coexist. We can carve out space for each by speaking up with dignity, meekness, love and respect.

So, if you find yourself wondering where you fit in this changing marriage landscape, don't worry. There's room at my table, pull up a chair.

Dushku, Alexander (July 7, 2015).https://www.iclrs.org/content/events/111/2130.mp4